This morning, a dear friend of mine named Malcolm passed away
after a seven month struggle with cancer. When he was first diagnosed
with an aggressive kidney cancer that had metastasize throughout his
body and into his brain, the doctors were hopeful they could prolong
Malcolm’s life for a year or so with chemo and radiation treatment. But,
it wasn’t meant to be. In seven short months, his fight was over. Dying
is often a cruel and bitter process when the person is larger than life
and exudes so much positive energy and optimism as Malcolm did.
During these past seven months, as I watched Malcolm’s physical condition deteriorate, I gave a great deal of thought to death and dying. It’s not a subject people typically think about, but as we get older and those we love become sick and die, it puts us in touch with our own mortality. It also prompts us to think about our own state of wellness and what we can do to extend our life.
In some cases, we’re cursed by unhealthy family genetics. In other instances, our personal vices such as alcohol abuse, smoking or chewing tobacco and unhealthy eating habits destroy our bodies to the point where the dye (no pun intended) is already cast. We’ll kick the bucket sooner than later.
As I watched Malcolm struggle to live through the end of summer, which was his goal, I also gave considerable thought to the subject of Legacy. I asked myself this question, “How will I be remembered?” When I asked Malcolm this same question a few months ago, he retorted, “How do you want to be remembered? It’s within your control.” I thought that was a profound response coming from someone who knew he was dying, and yet, he was determined to maintain his dignity until the very end and leave a legacy he was proud of. That he did.
When a person is confronted with death and dying, sometimes he or she can rise above the pettiness of everyday life and serve as a shining example of what it means to be courageous and loving — knowing all the while that death is imminent. I admired Malcolm for his courage and the positive legacy he left behind. In his case, he will be well remembered for his kindness, honesty, candor and his ability to bring out the best in others. I can’t think of a more positive legacy for someone to leave behind.
During these past seven months, as I watched Malcolm’s physical condition deteriorate, I gave a great deal of thought to death and dying. It’s not a subject people typically think about, but as we get older and those we love become sick and die, it puts us in touch with our own mortality. It also prompts us to think about our own state of wellness and what we can do to extend our life.
In some cases, we’re cursed by unhealthy family genetics. In other instances, our personal vices such as alcohol abuse, smoking or chewing tobacco and unhealthy eating habits destroy our bodies to the point where the dye (no pun intended) is already cast. We’ll kick the bucket sooner than later.
As I watched Malcolm struggle to live through the end of summer, which was his goal, I also gave considerable thought to the subject of Legacy. I asked myself this question, “How will I be remembered?” When I asked Malcolm this same question a few months ago, he retorted, “How do you want to be remembered? It’s within your control.” I thought that was a profound response coming from someone who knew he was dying, and yet, he was determined to maintain his dignity until the very end and leave a legacy he was proud of. That he did.
When a person is confronted with death and dying, sometimes he or she can rise above the pettiness of everyday life and serve as a shining example of what it means to be courageous and loving — knowing all the while that death is imminent. I admired Malcolm for his courage and the positive legacy he left behind. In his case, he will be well remembered for his kindness, honesty, candor and his ability to bring out the best in others. I can’t think of a more positive legacy for someone to leave behind.
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