The Perfect Father's Day Present

It’s that time of year when all the ladies start racking their brains trying to figure out, “What should I get Dad for Father’s Day?” He’s got everything he needs and he won’t give you any hints on what he really wants.
At the risk of alienating all my female friends, I’d like to suggest the perfect Father’s Day gift. But, before I do, let me just say that there’s a reason why most women haven’t offered this Father’s Day gift before. It’s not that they don’t think their men will appreciate it. On the contrary, they will! It’s not because the gift is too expensive. It’s not!

There’s a deeper, darker motive here. The truth is women have been keeping this gift idea a secret from men because women want to protect their private sanctuaries and enjoy a few minutes of peace and quiet, away from men. And, who can blame them. After all, we’re a bit demanding. Okay, we’re a pain! But, that’s just most of the time, not always.

But now, ladies, you can help bring out Dad’s nurturing, loving qualities with the perfect Father’s Day gift. Are you ready? Here it is… a pedicure and a manicure at your local spa!

Before you ladies rake me over the hot coals for revealing one of your most cherished, secret activities, consider the benefits and return-on-investment. Men deserve some of the creature comforts of life, right? All we really have are sports, poker games, fast cars, Netflix, a weekend nap and a night out with the boys whenever you’ll let us out of the house. But, if you’d introduce dear old Dad to the local spa – and, yes, you need to go with him so he doesn’t feel helpless or look stupid – you will transform him into that wonderful, cuddly man you’ve always wished for.

Now, ladies, there is one downside to this gift. Once Dad experiences a good manicure and pedicure – including the full foot massage treatment and getting his toe nails painted with a clear gloss – he’ll be spoiled rotten. He’ll want to go back every month. But, of course, being manly, he’ll never admit it. So, you’ll just have to make the return appointment for the spa on a day when the Masters isn’t on television or the grass doesn’t need to be mowed.

Ever since my wife introduced me to this fabulous treatment last year, I’ve been a loyal customer at our local pedicure spa. I was hesitant at first, but then, logic took over. I mean, what man in his right mind would let a gift certificate expire without being used!

Of course, boys, there is one hook that should be shared in the spirit of full disclosure. My wife doesn’t let me forget how indebted I should be to her for giving me such a wonderful Father’s Day present! Yes, dear, you are right as usual. Happy Father’s Day! 

About the Author: Tom Hinton is a popular speaker and the author of 10,000 Days: The Rest of Your Life, the Best of Your Life!  For information visit: www.tomhinton.com 

Graduation

by Tom Hinton

It’s a special time of year for so many parents as families and friends gather to celebrate the graduation of their sons and daughters from high school, college and graduate schools. I’ve been thinking about the significance and symbolism of graduation since my oldest daughter will graduate tomorrow with her Master’s Degree in Public Health.  Needless to say, I am proud of her accomplishments, but also relieved that we can finally stop writing those tuition checks!

I think most students work hard to graduate from high school. It’s no longer a cakewalk for many students like me who are right brain-dominated and must muddle through an educational system that is completely designed for left-brain kids. It’s unfair, but that’s a different Blog.

Graduation represents a significant accomplishment in their young lives. While everyone is expected to graduate from high school, I was surprised to learn that only 78.2 percent of high school students get their diploma on time.  This is according to a study sponsored by the Federal Reserve Bank of Cleveland.

Over the past 10 years the number of high school graduates continuing on to college has averaged just 67.2 percent a year. That figure tells me it’s getting more difficult for the 17-19 year-olds to get into college, or figure out their path in life, or pay for college. 

Of course, there’s always going to be a percentage of kids that just aren’t a good fit for college. This includes those students who want to pursue a specialty trade or craft, like plumbing, carpentry, or being an electrician – all very noble professions.  While they need good skills, they don’t need a college degree to earn a living.

Throughout our life, there are several significant moments that we should all celebrate and be proud of. Earning a degree and graduating from high school or college are such moments. It signifies we accomplished something.  We persevered and got the job done. We completed all the courses, weathered all the school policies and regulations, and met the academic requirements to earn that sheepskin. Now, we move on to our next challenge in life with greater confidence in our abilities and a higher level of self-esteem. To me, that’s the greatest symbolism of graduation. It builds character.

The Course of 10,000 Days teaches us that success and abundance in life are the result of hundreds of small victories and accomplishments. Very rarely do we have to scale Mt. Everest to achieve success, but there are hundreds of steep paths and trails we must traverse every day in order to make something of ourselves and achieve our goals and dreams. 

So, congratulations to all the graduates. You did it! Now, onward and upward to your next challenge.

A Tribute to John

A few hours ago I learned that a old friend named John had passed away fourth months ago. He was 75. Sadly, I had no idea John was ill. In fact, the last time we saw each other was 15 months ago. Our wives joined us for a delightful dinner in Santa Monica.

Although we hadn’t seen each other in years, we picked-up the dinner conversation right where we had left off seven years earlier — just as old friends do. We talked about the good old days, music, the business of songwriting (for which we shared a mutual passion) and life in general. There was never any mention of John’s battle with cancer. I had no idea he was struggling.

So, it was a shock to discover he had passed away. What is even more ironic is that just this morning, I found a scrap of paper with John’s address and email on it. I entered his information in my iPhone contact list. Then, two hours later, I received an email from a business contact announcing a memorial tribute to our late friend. How bizarre.

The Course of 10,000 Days reminds us that life is short. The average human being lives 30,000 days which equals 82 years. In John’s case, he only lived 75 years. My point is simply this. Cherish each day you live. Remain close to the people you love and remind them that you love them. Celebrate life and resolve to do good things with the brief time that remains.

My friend, John, certainly touched many of us is many positive ways. He was a good person who gave so much and expected so little in return. He created a wonderful legacy in 75 short years and will be well-remembered by those of us who read his books, heard his music and valued his friendship.

I Am

This week, at the suggestion of Happiness expert Barbara Yager, I watched the documentary film I Am directed by Tom Shadyac.  I strongly recommend it to anyone who wants to make our world a better place.

If Tom Shadyac’s name seems familiar it’s because he’s directed numerous slapstick comedies including the Jim Carrey smash hits Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, Bruce Almighty, and Liar Liar. Shadyac directed Eddie Murphy in The Nutty Professor as well as Robin Williams in Patch Adams. He also directed Accepted, and I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry.

But a few years ago, Shadyac shifted his talents and focus 180 degrees -- away from those multi-million dollar blockbuster movies to the abstract and esoteric questions “What’s wrong with the world and “What’s right with the world?”    

A serious biking accident triggered the radical change in Shadyac’s thinking, values and approach to life. He transitioned from one of Hollywood’s most successful writer/director/producers to a more serious student of life who could use his fame, fortune and film-making skills to ponder such enigmatic questions. The result of his world search for answers is captured beautifully in his documentary, I Am.

Shadyac’s research for meaningful answers to these complex questions took him around the world and back home to Malibu, California. Shadyac discovered that he is what’s wrong – or right – with the world. Thus, the title of his documentary, I Am. 

Shadyac pays attribution to Lord Chesterfield, the popular British statesman who lived in the 18^th century. It was Lord Chesterfield who was once asked the question, “What’s wrong with the world?” Chesterfield famously replied, “I am.”  Tom Shadyac’s research for a meaningful answer to this important question took him back some 260 years to Lord Chesterfield and the very same question Chesterfield was asked around 1740. 

While our world is more complex today than in the 1700s, the relationship between mankind and our connectivity to all living things is no different now than it was centuries ago. Nor, as Shadyac discovers, is humanity’s need to cooperate with and love our fellow man. While Shadyac has dispensed with the trappings of his fame and fortune, and now lives simply and teaches at a California university, he freely admits that it’s a very difficult transformation for anyone living in a consumer-oriented, capitalistic society to forego our ego needs and, instead, focus on our spiritual needs and live simply.

Of course, this is the same decision all the great prophets and teachers have made. Perhaps, Tom Shadyac’s new philosophy is best captured by one of our greatest teachers, Mahatma Gandhi, who counseled us to "Live simply so that others may simply live."

Here’s a link to Tom Shadyac’s I Am documentary website: http://iamthedoc.com/

Marathons Are for Crazy People... Or So I Thought!

I've never run a marathon before; and, for good reason... I'd die! I figure with my football knees I'd last about one mile and collapse. But, this morning I stood on the roadside and cheered-on thousands of runners -- including my daughter -- who undertook this amazing challenge and finished. 

I must admit, prior to attending today's event, I thought anyone who runs 26.2 miles -- or even 12+ miles as part of the half-marathon -- is either crazy or a masochist. After all, the event was instituted in commemoration of the fabled run of the Greek soldier Pheidippides, a messenger from the Battle of Marathon to Athens (a distance of 26.2 miles), who, shortly after delivering his victory message to the Generals, collapsed and died.  Need I say more?

Well, in fairness to Pheidippides and those 8,000+ courageous runners this morning, the answer is "yes." You see, after witnessing this spectacular event, I now understand a marathon runner's motivation a little better. The goal isn't necessarily to win, place or show, but rather to finish or beat their previous time. It's about setting a stretch goal then pushing yourself to your physical and mental limit to achieve that goal.

I find it fascinating that among the thousands of runners this morning were men and women of all ages, parents pushing strollers with their kids cuddled up inside, and even a blind women who used her red/white cane to guide herself along the route. It was a humbling moment for me to see so many valiant people struggle against their own physical, mental and emotional limitations and somehow summon up the strength and courage to cross that finish line.

So, hats off to all you wild n' crazy marathon runners. While I'll probably never wear a bib number, I will be out there standing along the route to cheer you on as you summon that last ounce of energy to cross the finish line. Because, now I understand what it demands of you. You have my respect. Way to go!

About the Author.  Tom Hinton is a professional speaker and the author of 10,000 Days: The Rest of Your Life, the Best of Your Life! which is available on Amazon.com  He can be reached at: tom@tomhinton.com

Living Your Passion

Last week, I was invited to speak at a university class on the topic Follow Your Dreams. I confessed to these eager juniors and seniors that it had only taken me 37 years to find the path to living my passion and follow my dreams.  But, today, there are fewer boundaries and more opportunities for twenty-year olds to express their dreams and live their passion. My point was simply it’s never too late to live your dream, and the sooner you begin to live your passion, the sooner you can begin charting your roadmap to fulfillment, abundance and success.

After my presentation, several students came forward seeking my personal advice and counsel on their goals and dreams. One enthusiastic young man told me, “I plan to be where you are in ten years.”  I wished him luck and encouraged him onward.  But, on my way back to the airport, it occurred to me that in ten years, he would only be 30 years old and, therefore, it would be impossible for him to “be where I was at” given his limited life experiences to that point.

Interestingly, this same point was made a few days later during a speech by Terry Hawkins, an outstanding speaker, trainer and author of the popular Stickman book series for kids. During her presentation, Terry shared a story about meeting a young lady who also aspired to be a speaker/author. Terry told us, “In our 50s, we have accumulated many memories. But, in our 20s, we have few memories and life experiences. That’s why life gets harder as we get older, and that’s why no one in their 20s or 30s can quite be like me.  It’s my life experiences and stories that make me different and unique from anyone else.” 

How true that is. Each of us is destined to travel our own path. At various intersections of your life, there are choices you must make and consequences for every choice. Some consequences are very positive – meeting the love of your life at the party you decide to attend at the last minute, or finding out about a great job opportunity from a friend of a friend who happens to be there.

Living your passion is one of the cornerstones of The Course of 10,000 Days™. To live your passion, you need to answer two simple, but demanding questions. First, “What is it that you love to do so much, you would do it for free; but, you’re so good at it someone will pay you to do it?  Secondly, what’s your plan for success?  The sooner you can answer those questions, the sooner you can begin to live your passion.

About the Author: Tom Hinton is a professional speaker and the author of the popular new book, 10,000 Days: The Rest of Your Life, the Best of Your Life! He teaches The Course of 10,000 Days™, a dynamic personal development and self-growth weekend retreat for individuals who want to live their passion, love their life and create a lasting legacy. For information please visit: www.10000Days.org

Finding True Happiness: Is It Possible?

by Tom Hinton

At a recent workshop, I was asked by a 51 year-old participant if he could ever find true happiness? My answer startled him as well as the other participants in the room. I said, “Probably not.” 

There was a nervous laughter and everyone waited for my next line. But I said nothing and started to move on to my next point. An anxious, almost desperate look filled the participants’ eyes as they looked at me hoping for a more elaborate, encouraging statement. I waited a long moment to let the uneasiness settle inside the pit of everyone’s stomach, and then I asked the all-important question. “Why are you asking me if true happiness is possible? Is that not your responsibility? Who is in control of your life right now? Is it me, or is it you?”  It was an ah-ha moment not only for many of the participants, but also myself. I realized that most people are dependent on someone else or something else for their happiness.

When you choose to be truly happy, that is when happiness begins. The primary reason someone is unhappy is because their approach to life is all wrong. We depend on someone else or something else for our happiness. In that case, you will never be truly happy. For the source of true happiness will not be found in riches, your ideal job or in the arms of another person. True happiness lies within each and every one of us. It requires us to move beyond life’s drudgery, impatience, bitterness and the negativity we experience every day; and, replace those moments with gratitude for life and the gifts you possess. When you choose to be happy, it is at that moment that true happiness begins.

So, is it possible to find true happiness? Yes, but it requires a different approach than the one most people use. It requires you to focus on those things that make you happy. It requires you to begin now if you want to be happy at this moment. You cannot be happy and irritated at the same time. You cannot be happy and hold grudges or withhold love from someone. You cannot be bitter and also claim to be happy. You cannot expect everything to go smoothly in life and when it doesn’t curse the world, but also claim to be happy 

Yes, you can have happy moments, but that is different from experiencing true happiness. True happiness occurs when you have peace of mind and your heart is filled with gratitude and love. True happiness is knowing that you are not dependent on anything or anyone else for your state of being. When we arrive at this point, we can begin to know true happiness. 

About the Author:  Tom Hinton is one of America’s most respected authors and speakers on Personal Growth, Work-Life Balance and Achieving Your Human Potential. He is the author of four books including: 10,000 Days: The Rest of Your Life, the Best of Your Life which is available on www.Amazon.com  For information, contact: tom@tomhinton.com